to be real is to be whole

It is at this difficult juncture when the individual first fully appreciates his separation, deals emotionally with the impact of that reality, and is called upon to integrate his magnificence with his vulnerability. This rapproachement with reality represents the individual's first attempt to reconcile an idealized dream, which includes that illusions of symbiosis and grandiosity, with the realities of existence, which include separateness and limitation. If the environment can accept and nurture both sides of this polarity, love the wonders of an emerging person and the beauty of an open, dependent baby, the realness of the individual is bolstered, reinforced, and actualized. Then, the individual can be as magnificent as she was born to be and as weak and vulnerable as she was born to be.

- Stephen M. Johnson P.h.D., professor and chair of the faculty at the Pacific Graduate School of Psychology